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Submitted on
February 19, 2012
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Call Me Sally: Trailer

Narrator: In a dangerous time…

*Cue dramatic music*

Narrator: Where chaos and lawlessness are around every corner…
One name still strikes fear into the heart of criminals…

Sela: I'm Sela Vesna! Special Tactics and Reconnaissance! And no one gets away from me!

*Single gunshot*

Sela: *quietly* No one.

Narrator: But a new threat has emerged in Council Space that threatens all sentients…

Salarian Councilor: We need a Spectre to deal with this!

Human Councilor: *bangs podium* But there are no more Spectres who can handle this!

Asari Councilor: There may be someone we can call…

Narrator: Sela Vesna will encounter her greatest challenge yet…

Human Councilor: You will need to act with the utmost discretion!

Sela: Understood, Councilor!

Asari Councilor: No, Sela, I don't think you do…

Narrator: Going under cover…

Salarian Agent: We've chosen a perfect identity for you…

*Music suddenly stops*

Sela: *Incredulous* Sally Struthers?

Salarian Agent: It's fool proof!

Narrator: *quizzical* As a human?


Turian Spectre: I think you look good in pink.

*Violent crash*

Sela: *still screaming* ARRRGH!

*Start whimsical music*

Narrator: Coming soon to an extranet service near you…

Effeminate Hairdresser: Any color preferences?

Sela: *confused* No?

*Whooshing sound*

Effeminate Hairdresser: I went with blonde. My best work EVAR…

*Brief pause*

Effeminate Hairdresser: *crying* Oh, It was like you were born in Texas!

Sela: *deadpan* I hate humans.

Narrator: Comes a fish out of water tale…

Human Male: Hi, I'm David.

Sela: Sally! Sally Struthers!

*Music pauses*

David: *perplexed* Like the actress?

*Music resumes, slightly more emotional*

Narrator: that will warm your heart…
(NB: substitute 'hearts' in Krogan dominated markets)

David: What are you doing for the holidays?

Sela: *stumbling* I… uh… *hurriedly* PASSOVER!

Older Male Human: *confused* Funny, she doesn't look Jewish!

Narrator: And teach us that sometimes, we learn the most about ourselves when we look through someone else's eyes…

David: *emotional* I'm glad you're here.

Sela: *emotional* Yeah. Me too!

Narrator:  Shiala Iallis (Off Stage)… Mitchell Daniels (Blasto: The Jellyfish Stings)… Melvin Brooks III(History of the Galaxy: Part II)… Clara Fields… Pallin Talid… and Oscar award-winner Dame Sarah Grey (Starless)…
(NB: only use film credits in markets where trends indicate it would aid in sales)

*Music stops, sound of fire alarm*

Sela: *panicked* Oh Goddess! Oh Goddess! Burning food! Burning food!

*Metallic clang, followed by extinguishing noises*

*Music resumes*

Narrator: Call Me Sally!

Sela: *proudly* Dinner's ready!

*David chokes on bite*

David: *strained* 's good. *coughs* Got water?

*Human female child laughs*

*Music stops*

Narrator: This sim is not yet rated…

The above is based on characters and situations created by Bioware... etc. etc. etc.

Okay. Soooooo... I was kinda not feeling my writing grove tonight, until I came across this from Cerberus Daily News:

06/21/2010 - Weekend Box Office Suffers 17% Slump
“The weekend box office is down 17% from this time last year... "Call Me Sally" opened at 1.33 billion, proving that painting an undercover asari Spectre in human makeup is still good fish-out-of-water comedy...

I was also inspired by a piece called 'Justicar' that was done by an fantastic artist, Magdalena. I pictured that character as 'Sela the Spectre' (as played by Shiala Iallis (Yes, she's an OC, too)).
You can find the piece here: [link] and I highly suggest that you look at the rest of Magdalena's work as well. Found here: :iconodrobinka:
She is one of my favorite artists on the Citadel... I mean :devart:! Right, :devart:!

Anyway, the rest just came to me. And I admit, it is vastly different from everything else I have written. But I like it! So there!
Add a Comment:
Odrobinka Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2012
I do agree, someone should definitely make a trailer of it. It would be great to see it. Even if it's to late for using it in ME3 ;)
And once again thank You sooo much for all Your kind words :hug:
dkz02 Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2012
There's always the DLC! And it is praise you deserve!:clap:
Terrortheslayer Featured By Owner Feb 19, 2012
Well... someone needs to put that in ME XD lol
dkz02 Featured By Owner Feb 19, 2012
I'd watch/listen to it! :D
MistaSilentKiller Featured By Owner Feb 19, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
ROFL :XD::rofl:

that's hilarious
Add a Comment: